Wednesday, July 27, 2005

hnt, i'm a boring sob this week...

my bony hand rocking out.


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roadhouse is on...again.

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is there anyone left on earth who hasn't seen 'Roadhouse' at least 4 or 5 times? cuz i fucking have. and for some reason i have to watch it every damn time.

Monday, July 25, 2005

this, my friends, is a perfect example of bad Can-con...

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for all of you who do not recognize this man, this is shawn desman. he is Canada's cheap, lame-ass version of Usher except he's way worse and even more annoying than whiny whoa-oa-oa U-boy (who, by the way, has been pleasantly absent from my summer!). betcha didn't think that was possible, did ya?

anywho, my gripe of the moment is what the fuck has shawn done to his hair? really, who though this was a good idea? i fucking hate him and his crappy music and his bullimic girl videos and it really pisses me off that he (badly) ripped off Yaz. yeah shawn, you're so fucking 'street' with your hair, tracksuit, and bad lick-and-stick tattoos. please go back to your house in brampton or whatever...

Friday, July 22, 2005

boring...

holy shit, i am a boring blogger when i'm happy. and for the first time in over a year, i think i'm genuinely happy again. not just 'doing ok and faking my way through' happiness but actual, 'things are going well and i'm optimistic about stuff' happiness. unfortunately, this yields fewer good stories about stupid people and assholes who piss me off and that kind of thing. sorry.

i guess i shouldn't complain about being happy because i'm sure soon it will end and then i'll be back bitching and moaning and waiting to get screwed over again. until then, you'll have to deal with happy (and less interesting) ago-go.

Thursday, July 21, 2005

happy hnt!

taken last night....


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Wednesday, July 20, 2005

how soon the joy dissipates....

weird day today.

all my happiness from yesterday seems to have worn off.

not sad really, just feeling lonely.

feeling guilty for going out all the time and leaving mom at home.

feeling guilty for really wanting to move out and get my own place.

my body hates me again.

my muscles and joints ache like a bitch.

mosquito counts are in the thousands.

i think i might have West Nile Virus.

no, i'm not a hypochondriac.

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

all is well

thanks kids for all the crossed appendages!

the interview went really well as far as i can tell. very relaxed nice people and the new library building rocks! they'll contact me within the next 2 weeks with the competition results. overall, i feel fabulous. today is a good day!

Monday, July 18, 2005

call for support

job interview. tomorrow. 9am. would be a fucking kick-ass job and the answer to my money difficulties. if you love me, keep your fingers crossed.

the list (stolen lovingly from megan)

1. the creepy violinist who was into tantra

2. the actor who rode the Partridge family bus across the US, became a hard-core Scientologist, and claimed that Lupus could be cured by getting "clear". oh, and whose next girlfriend was on Popstars 2 -making the boy/girl band

3. the drug addict who owned a hearse and got his roommate to tattoo a huge pentagram on his forearm because he was sad cuz he thought i had broken up with him

4. the one who was in the Air Force but was afraid to fly

5. the elfin musician who was chronically late

6. the radio guy who managed to break my heart without us ever 'dating'

7. the illegal steroid user who dumped me over the phone and then got his

8. the one i really really really hope works out

Friday, July 15, 2005

that was the longest weekend ever...

of course it was also the hottest weekend of the year. 34 degrees and all the photos were outdoors. the poor guys were melting in their suits and despite my pointy cone boobs being semi-remedied (although i had to keep readjusting them), i nearly died and felt like i looked like shit.

it seems i am the crazy bridesmaid. this is very funny to me because i am rarely ever "the crazy person" in a group. but when you put me in a limo with stoic british guys, married women with babies, and shy country girls, apparently i appear wild and insane. go figure. there should be many silly photos of me goofing off.

i kicked ass with my speech. seriously kicked ass! i was all worried about cute accented UK best man and he was too nervous to eat his game hen! ha ha! and i was way funnier and everyone laughed.

best man had this girlfriend from Brazil. she walked in the room and just oozed sex. it was dripping off her and her emerald green strapless dress, matching pashmina, and flower in her hair into fucking puddles on the floor. and then she started dancing, my god. damn Brazil. i couldn't let her show up the canadian girls so i gave her a run for her money. did not bad if i do say so myself.

what else? oh, i ate all the sugared fruit on our table centrepiece and the 'country' relatives looked at me like i was eating plastic fruit or something but they're just rednecks so i don't care. i fed my friend and her boyfriend the grapes...that will be a good photo!

so yeah, it was a good night and then it was all over...all that prep for one day! geez, it was lovely but i seriously can't ever see myself doing that kind of wedding thing. my wedding will be a pool party with McCain's Deep and Delicious cake served straight from the tin.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

hnt, again. i really need to get some more photos on my computer, i'm running out of material...




arm and sliver of back.



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hey everybody....

this is Taz.

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Taz is very sad because he has failed miserable at ridding Winnipeg of the evil mosquitoes the 'natural' way and now has to whip out the big malathion chemical guns because people are raging because they can't go outdoors.

actually, he's more sad because now, since he has failed miserably at his job, he won't get to make out with me after all!

poor Taz, maybe i should have made my announcement public and he would have tried harder.

Saturday, July 09, 2005

wedding hiatus...

i will be taking a brief blogging break for 3 days of wedding madness. i have to give the toast to the bride and i'm dreading it, not because i'm not funny but because the guy giving the toast to the groom is cute and planning to speak for 10 minutes and has an adorable english accent to distract people if he says something dumb....me, not so much! anywho, keep your fingers crossed for me and i'll see y'all on tuesday!

go-go

Thursday, July 07, 2005

five question interview....sorry lucky pink....i am on fucking slow gear.

i asked lucky pink to interview me. it took forever for me to do but i finally did!

here are the instructions:
1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below saying "interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions -- each person's will be different.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

i will try to be prompt in selecting questions!

here's what amber asked me:


1. Your dream date. From start to finish, what is it?

i get picked up by the boy on a moped and we go for dinner & drinks. dinner takes 3 or 4 hours because the conversation is going so well. we eventually make it out of the bar/restaurant and head off to the top of a parkade to people watch and hug. maybe after we head to a beach to take a walk, a swim, and lie on the beach and watch the stars and kiss. at the end of the night some good 'ladies first' action in a king-sized bed would be good. and then at least 8 hours of sleep. and blueberry pancakes for breakfast.


2. You've been elected mayor of your city. What are you going to do?

1) get some fucking vision and ensure that young people stop leaving Winnipeg for places like Vancouver and Calgary.

2) build an overpass at Kenaston, it just needs to happen.

3) end the concrete/road construction conspiracy...i'm convinced that there is a type of concrete that can deal with extreme heat and cold and not fall apart every season.

4) prosecute sicko johns who frequent child prostitutes. bastards should burn in hell.



3. You've just discovered that you have to ability to make yourself invisible whenever you feel like it. What do you do with your new power?

spy spy spy like there's no tomorrow! i think i'd mostly spy on ex-boyfriends and see what they're doing. and on guys i think are cute. and on people who get my resume and don't call me for interviews. and if i had a boyfriend i'd sneak up him and do things like scare him or appear in his bed or something.


4. You've been hired on as a princess at Disneyland. Which princess are you and why?

I am Sleeping Beauty because she has the best dress and gets to make out with a prince. and she has those cute fairy godmothers. although, I'd actually rather be Melificent because she's waaaay cooler....but she's a queen, not a princess.


5. You've just signed a contract to turn your life into a reality show. What's the name of your show and what will it focus on?

my show will be called "am i not the cutest unemployed librarian you have ever seen?" and will focus on my adventures at school with my student boyfriends. and when i am in not in school it will focus on my job search and my bellydancing. there will be lots of closeups of me rolling my eyes.

better late than never, right?....right?

yeah, i fucking suck. i'm a slack ass and can't keep up on blogging lately. that's what happens when you temporarily work full time and have to prep for a public bellydancing show that you seriously regret inviting all your friends to and you are in a wedding party on saturday and have to deal with a psychotic seamstress and write the toast to the bride and figure out how to do your hair so it won't look like shit in the 34 degree heat on saturday. that's my excuse. so here's my picture. i'll shut up now.


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Monday, July 04, 2005

just not enough hours in the day

i am very very behind on my blog reading, it's terrible. it's like there's just not enough time in the day. what the hell am i going to do when i actually get a job?

because i am lame, here are some highlights of the last few days:


  • the last day of school was on thursday. it made me cry that i won't see my boys anymore. i had to run to the bathroom and sob because i didn't want anyone to see me like that. those little shits have no fucking clue that they helped me make it through some very rough times.



  • there was a pole at the bar i was at saturday night. i thought of jen.



  • turns out "the boy" did email me after the drunk arm-wrestling fiasco. i just never got it.



  • what's it with guys liking girls who look like 1976? so not a good look...



  • wimpy handshakes really annoy me.



  • ashton's friends still won't talk to him. ahhh, such great revenge and i didn't have to do a darn thing.



  • men are fucking base individuals. sometimes it's very sad.