fucking government, i should tell everyone i know about your top-secret interview bullshit...

yesterday i found out that for sure i didn't get any of the job/s i didn't kiss ass for in quebec a couple of weeks ago. i wasn't a first choice, or a second choice (or a 10th or 11th choice for that matter) which looks exceptionally bad considering that lots of people got 3 or 4 1st choice offers.

initially i hadn't been upset about it but today it really hit me when i got an email from a guy who was also at the job fair. he was pretty odd and he got a job today! he did and i didn't! and today i keep getting emails from our 'list' with people saying "congrats! see you in ottawa where we can spend all this money the government will be giving us! yay!". fuck that.

when i wasn't the only loser who didn't get chosen i didn't feel so bad...now that i am the only person i know who didn't get selected (i don't know who the other 9 rejects are, maybe i should try and find them) and considering that there were 45 people and 35 positions and i could have been considered for nearly 20 of them (which is pretty good odds), i feel shafted. and i know i should feel good because hell, i was 1 of 45 chosen (out of 2000 applicants)...that's pretty damn good! right? right. but i still feel shitty, it's the fucking rejection that never seems to end that really burns.

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