the purple lady

this is a post i was going to write before whole dad thing...but the story is still funny so i figured i'd share it.

at the lame library conference i was at a few weeks ago there was this lady who had a kiosk and was trying to hock this book she had written. it was a book of photos of flowers of Manitoba accompanied by poems. she was a nice lady but totally loopy: all dressed in purple with a monstrous purple bow and gold string in her hair and humongous tinted glasses that came halfway down her cheeks. she also muttered to herself a lot.

my friend S, the vendor, had been accosted by the purple lady earlier in the day and suggested i go meet her. just from the looks of things i was game. we walked up to her kiosk and she proceeded to hug me at least 3 times and told me that i didn't hug hard enough (which was a total lie btw, i totally hug hard enough!)

anywho, she kept touching me and S and guilted him into buying a copy of her book. then she ran to her purse, dug out this crocus pin and pinned it on his lapel while reciting a poem. it was quite a long poem. i told S later that that meant they were going steady! she then started talking about how she could feel my energy or aura or something...i think that was good but i'm not sure. she also explained how when people don't like hugs she'll just 'vibe' them. apparently putting both of your hands on someone's shoulders and holding them there is 'vibe-ing' them. who knew? she also told us that her friend who had done the photos for her book was an owl...and a wolf! not sure what that meant either.

fucking hilarious it was! i tried to get other people to go see the purple lady but they were too scared. big chickens!